One Drunken Night
by Alexis Shepard
Summary: Lena Luthor cannot cope with losing the only person she cares about. In a drunken stupor, she does something she may regret for a long time. Supercorp with mentions of Mon-El/Kara.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: Hello! I'm not dead!**

 **I had posted this story on AO3 and totally forgot to post it here. Luckily for you, my FFN-only readers, you get the whole, complete story in one go, unlike my AO3 readers who had to wait an eternity for the second chapter. (I know some of you want more of my other stories. I'm getting there.)**

 **Sit back and enjoy some angsty Supergirl fic with a fluffy ending. Leave a review if you enjoy this little thing.**

* * *

Eyes pierced the dark cellphone screen, waiting to see it light up with a sign of life. Instead, the screen mocked her, taunted her as she went ignored. Lena Luthor had gone ignored for the past weeks by the only person she had ever come to care for. Kara had forgotten about her existence. A wine glass reached red-stained lips. How many drinks did she have? Not enough to forget her misery.

The abandonment Lena felt was not instant. First, the replies came less often. Lena could tolerate the postponed lunches; Kara was a busy reporter with a hard-ass boss. Lena understood. But when the excuses became short and weak and nonexistent, Lena knew something was up. So, she called. The automated voice sending her to voicemail ridiculed her as she spoke a message lined with a pathetic tone of voice. Soft, begging. Urging.

Lena's heart begged to be near Kara. It was difficult to admit it, but she missed the quirky reporter. She missed those eyes that could read into her words and choke the air out of her lungs. She missed that radiant smile that never failed to create one of her own as it warmed up a piece of her long thought dead and cold.

Lena missed those rosy lips that called her name and told her everything would be alright. She ached for those lips to touch hers for the very first time.

She snorted to herself, picking up the near-empty bottle and drinking from it. What a pathetic mess she was now. The great, terrifying Luthor brought to her knees by a reporter that stole her heart. What were those walls for if not to protect herself from the world? How was it possible for one person to just bulldoze through them recklessly until she was left bare?

Now she was bare and alone. Again.

She knew why Kara had been ignoring her, however. Lena had played a part in sending Mon-El away. The man that stole Kara's heart. The man that broke Lena's because he took all that she had from her.

Bitter memories rose as she took another swill of her drink. Sudden smiles and laughter rising during lunch after receiving a message. Bright, wide eyes as Kara retold the events of game night the evening before, how she and Mon-El made a terrible team but still managed to beat the rest of her friends. How Kara couldn't do dinner next Tuesday because she had a date with Mon-El.

Mon-El. Mon-El. Mon-El.

It tore Lena. It tore at her shriveled soul that it was someone else and not her that caused those smiles. She wanted to be the cause Kara slept late because game night went on too long, or they had too many drinks, or the date went on too late. Every fiber of her being cried out to be at Kara's side at night.

"God, I really am pathetic."

The room spun as Lena stood from her couch, legs barely holding her up, the sound of her heels resonating around her dark and empty apartment. She walked out toward the elevator, not knowing where to go but needing to leave before she suffocated.

Everything blurred around her. She welcomed the cloud that came over her as the elevator moved downward. It was better than the misery that ate at her mind every night.

The elevator doors slid open. A man in a suit looked at Lena once, then again as he noticed her leaning onto the walls, clearly inebriated.

"Ms. Luthor, let me help you."

Lena let out a chuckle. "I'm fine, Adam. Just… just get me in the car. Drive. Don't care where, just drive."

"Yes, ma'am."

Lena waited by the elevator as Adam quickly walked away into the large parking garage. The bright lights and deafening sound of a car alarm going off in the nearby street forged a headache. Maybe leaving wasn't such a good idea. She had to, though. Being in her apartment with nothing but an empty bottle of wine wouldn't help Lena. _There's always the whiskey._

Before Lena could make up her mind, a black car rode up in front of her. Adam emerged from the driver side and came around to open the door for his boss. She stumbled, holding onto the car to avoid faceplanting on the ground. Boy, was she out of it. Gaining her bearings, she slid into the back seat and let her head fall back as Adam closed the door.

Briefly, she wondered what Kara was up to. With Mon-El gone, what could possibly keep her? That was another thing that plagued Lena. Her selfishness. Kara was mourning. Or at least, she was trying to pretend nothing was wrong. Of course Kara would want nothing to do with her. How could she tolerate Lena when all she wanted was attention?

The city lights filtered into Lena's mind and she finally noticed the car was moving. She couldn't tell how far they had driven. All she could see were the street signs dashing by her. Every single place seemed to hold Kara's presence. A part of her hated that. Kara's essence permeated all of National City. Including Lena.

The car stopped at a red light. She took the moment to take in the surroundings. Or tried to. Everything was doubled, moving, shaking. All she could make out was the bright, neon sign of a tattoo parlor announcing its 24/7 services.

"Adam, park here."

The car turned and stopped near the corner of the curb. For a split second, Lena's insides wanted to escape through her mouth. She shook her head before going for the door. Adam opened it first, though, and she fell forward. Adam caught her, straightening her in her seat before helping her exit the car.

"Wait here," she instructed.

The perks of being a Luthor was that her name made her so terrifying that even when she was falling down drunk, her orders were still obeyed and never questioned.

She made her way to the sign, the streets of National City largely empty at the time. Lena wasn't sure, but it was probably close to midnight, if not already past it. Groggy arms pushed the glass door open. The smell of cigarettes and ink flooded her senses, causing her to nearly lurch as an electronic bell sound rang throughout the parlor.

"Coming," a voice announced from… somewhere. It was difficult to focus when rock music was blasting from everywhere. Lena found a chair and sat, reclining back on it. The feeling of the ripped leather under her palms woke something in her. What the hell was she doing inside a tattoo parlor? She wasn't 16 and she certainly wasn't the type for a tattoo. Luthors were immaculate; a tattoo tarnished the skin and image that she had to—

"Welcome to Rad Tats, girl. What are ya having?"

Lena looked up and peered at the figure in front of her. A man with a white t-shirt and jeans stood with his arms crossed, a cigarette between his teeth. Both of his arms held countless tattoos, some colored, others dark. Or maybe she just couldn't tell the difference between colors anymore.

What was she having, though? A mid-life crisis?

"Yeah, I, uh… I'm getting a tattoo."

 _Guess I'll find out._


	2. Chapter 2

Her cellphone beeped repeatedly with the sound of her alarm going ignored. Kara lay in bed, the morning sun shining through a closed window. She knew if she used her superhearing, she'd hear birds chirping, their wings flapping in the morning breeze as the people below them on the streets went to grab breakfast with friends or get ready for the day listening to some joyful song. She shut off the alarm.

How dare the world feel so gleeful.

A part of her wanted the whole world to feel the rage, the pain, the _uselessness_ she felt inside. She wanted the whole world to burst into flame so they could all understand what losing felt like.

But that was not something Supergirl would wish. Nor Kara Danvers.

Kara Zor-El on the other hand...

It was an identity crises. Like she was being split into pieces. Kara Danvers cared for the people of earth. She truly did. She had friends and family and nothing could ever replace the feeling of saving someone's life or putting a bad person in prison. She loved being Supergirl.

Right now, however, Kara wanted nothing to do with it.

It had been months since the daxamite invasion had been stopped. Months to repair the damage they left behind. Months to run through that day she forced Mon-El off the planet forever. There had been no time to mourn. There had barely been enough time to say goodbye. She had done it again. She had abandoned someone again. First her parents back on Krypton, now Mon-El. Who would be next?

She sat up, a heavy sigh leaving her lungs. There were other, more immediate things to worry about. James was on her ass about deadlines, Alex wouldn't stop pestering her with joining her and the others for game night, and Lena... Lena wouldn't stop worrying. Lena was another matter entirely.

There was something about Lena that drew Kara to her. Even when she was with Mon-El, there had been some days where she would prefer the company of the CEO than his. Lena was human. She didn't have worries that threatened whole worlds or galaxies. She was an important woman with presence, but when they met, everything faded. The DEO, the problems of Supergirl. Even the pain of Mon-El faded. Her eyes, an indescribable shade of green and blue, just blocked everything out. Somewhere, deep within Kara's mind, she knew her feelings for Lena weren't exclusively just as friends. She would never admit that, however.

A part of her felt terrible for ignoring her. A very big part of her. She had seen the missed calls on her phone. The texts messages gone ignored. She had been justifying her actions by telling herself that saving people was more important than one person.

But Lena didn't know that.

Kara's jaw set. She threw off her bed covers and-in nearly light speed-changed out of her pajamas, stuffed her face with some cereal, and was out the door. In a few seconds, she stood in an alley next to the L-Corp building. She stormed through the glass doors, disobeying her cells telling her to just fly up to the top floor and tell Lena-

She stopped in front of the elevator. What was she going to tell Lena? _I'm sorry I've been ignoring you, I've just been very miserable the past weeks. Want to grab some food later?_ That wouldn't do. The elevator pinged, grabbing her attention. The empty, metal box made her breakfast stir in her stomach. What _was_ she going to tell Lena? She strode in, pushing the button that would take her to Lena's office. _Where I'm going to apologize_. That's what she should do, right? She had been a horrible friend. Selfish. What if Lena had needed something from her all this time? Worse, what if Lena had been in danger and Kara couldn't have saved her because she was too busy wallowing in self-pity?

Kara gripped the purse hanging from her shoulder tighter, mindful of not ripping it. Yes, she would apologize. Would Lena forgive her? Probably not, but at least it would be another disappointment Kara could tick off on her list and wallow on later.

She strode out of the elevator, giving a quick nod at Lena's secretary. The woman stood quickly, heels clicking loudly as she ran to stand in front of her.

"Ms. Luthor isn't taking any visitors today."

Kara was stunned. "What do you mean she isn't taking visitors? Is she sick? Did something happen to her?" Gears began to move in Kara's mind. If something had happened to Lena while Kara was off being sorry for herself, she would never forgive herself.

"She is fine, but I suggest you come back another day. Perhaps I can schedule a meeting?"

 _Think fast, Kara._ She scrunched her eyebrows, looking over the secretary's shoulder. "Hey, stop!" Kara shouted. "Someone just ran off with something that was on your desk!"

The secretary turned sharply. "What?! Where?"

"Toward the board room. Isn't that where the stairs are? They could be getting away!"

The secretary ran in the direction Kara had pointed, calling security through an earpiece. Kara took the opportunity and slipped toward's Lena's office. Without a knock or warning, Kara walked into her office.

 _Oh, Rao..._

Lena stood facing the view of National City. Her hair, usually in a tight bun, hung loose past her shoulders, a waterfall cast in darkness. The shapely dress she wore accentuated her hourglass figure and hid her arms in long sleeves, leaving only long and slender legs to view. She was looking down, something on her arm, judging by her posture.

The door shut loudly behind her, startling both women. Lena turned, cloudy eyes focusing on Kara.

"Kara, what are you doing here? I told Jess I wouldn't be seeing anyone today."

The remark stung the kryptonian. Of course she wouldn't even see her. She had lost that right after all she had done. But she was here to fix everything. Or try to.

"Lena, I'm sorry, I just-" Lena turned her body fully, revealing a white patch on her forearm. "Oh, my god, what happened to your arm?"

Lena quickly put her arm behind her back. "Nothing."

Kara walked towards her, dropping her bag near a chair. She stood before Lena, an unmoving, unresponsive statue of a human showing no clue into her mind. An expression reserved only for board members and people she tended not to trust. Something inside Kara cracked a little. She took a step back.

"I need to apologize," Kara began. "I came here to say that I have not been myself, nor have I been the friend you deserve. I promised I would always be there for you and I failed you. I failed the way I've failed so many times in the past as-" she caught herself. This wasn't the time to tell her. Not yet. "I just want to apologize. I'm sorry for ignoring you, Lena. I didn't mean to. And I feel terrible for it. I know I don't deserve your forgiveness, but... I don't know." A pause. "I'm sorry."

She wished one of her powers was telepathy so she could read Lena's mind. All she needed was understanding, an acknowledgement. She would take a nod at this point. Kara reached for the arm that hung by Lena's side, the one not hiding behind her back. Searching for any resistance, she inched towards Lena's hand until it was within her grasp. She began passing her thumb over Lena's knuckles, an intimate gesture they reserved only for themselves. Giving up on reading Lena's face, she stared down at the hand she caressed. Immaculate, flawless skin. Perfect.

"Like you."

Lena finally spoke. "What was that?"

 _Yes, Kara. What was that?_ She let Lena's hand fall back to her side. She felt heat beginning to rise from her neck. This wasn't the time for her subconscious to come out and say stuff she didn't mean! _But I do mean it. At least, I think I do. I do, right? Lena is-_

"Kara?" Lena waved an arm in front of her. The arm with the white cloth on the forearm. That refocused the reporter. She grabbed Lena's arm as humanly fast as she could, examining it. "Kara, it's nothing. Look if you want my forgiveness, you have it. Now can you please-"

"Is that a tattoo?" Even with her glasses on, Kara could see the faded lines of ink. She pretended to adjust her glasses, giving her a split second to look without them. Lena pulled her arm away as soon as she was about to see what the tattoo was, but it was definitely a tattoo.

"Yes, it is. Now can we please drop it and go back to-"

"Why did you get a tattoo? I mean, I don't mind at all. It adds to your character, I just didn't think you'd ever go for one."

* * *

God damn it all. How could Kara just waltz in without warning and say all of that, ask for forgiveness and treat her with such tenderness, when she was in a less than acceptable situation?

Of course she would tell it was a tattoo. It's why she was such a great reporter; she had an amazing eye for being able to tell when things were off and see the truth behind everything. _One of my favorite qualities about her._

She mentally shook her head, turning away from Kara. She didn't have a choice anymore. She had a glaring tattoo on her arm and she was acting weird and Kara caught on. There was no way to escape from this now. Better to say it now, that their friendship is so fractured, than when it's whole again. Better to lose her now when she's already lost her than to lose her later when it will hurt a million times more.

Lena turned back to Kara, crossing her arms. "You want to know what I think when I see you?" A knot began forming in her throat.

"What does-"

"I see an amazing woman. A woman who could take on the world without a second thought. A selfless woman who would do anything to protect those she loves, who would sacrifice more than Supergirl for her loved ones. I see into your eyes and I see my entire world. Now, you come in here and ask for forgiveness and how can I say no to... to the woman I care about? How can I say no to you Kara Danvers, whom I have loved since the day you sat on that couch and promised to protect me forever?"

Silence filled the office. A single tear rolled down her cheek, wiped away roughly with the back of her hand. She looked down at the floor, a gesture she hadn't done since she as a child, being berated by her mother. She felt like that little girl again. Alone, empty, angry at herself for being so weak.

Fingers on her chin forced her head up into those damn eyes. Those eyes that held the door to the entire universe.

She gasped as Kara's lips crashed with hers. A hand slithered into her loose hair as Kara deepened the kiss. Everything faded. The tattoo, the pain, the anger, the misery. Everything evaporated when Kara pulled her closer, moving her other hand from her chin to her cheek. Nothing in the universe existed anymore. Just Kara.

It ended all too soon for her, even if it felt like an eternity. Surely she was dreaming. She would wake up in her apartment, alone, and throw the nearest object against a wall in anger at herself. Surely, at any moment now...

"I should've told you sooner. I guess that's why I was never truly happy with Mon-El. Because all the time you and I were together, I felt like I belonged. For the first time in a long time, I felt home. I truly am sorry for being such a jerk to you. I didn't know what to do with myself. I came up here today to apologize, not to harass you into," Kara gestured at them both, "this."

She didn't wake up. This was actually happening and her mind, for all it's genius, couldn't process it. "I was so miserable yesterday. I drank myself into a stupor, thinking you were ignoring me because I played a part in sending Mon-El away and knowing you would never look at me as more than just your friend, if you ever even looked at me again." She paused, presenting her arm to Kara. "You want to see what it is? Like I said, I was very drunk."

At Kara's nod, she began peeling away the cloth that protected the ink from smearing or her skin from becoming infected. Surprise did not cover what was going through Kara's face.

"You... you got my name tattooed?"

Lena opened her mouth to defend herself, but decided against it. There was nothing to defend. It was a very nice design if Lena thought about it. An elegant cursive font spelled out the reporter's name, the large, intricate "K" beginning next to the crease of her inner elbow, flowing gently from letter to letter, finishing the "a" near her wrist. Below the name, an equally elegant pattern flowed.

Kara kissed her again. "You are brilliant. You are amazing. Nothing could ever make me think otherwise. Lena Luthor, you are just phenomenal." She looked at Lena's arm. "And your taste in tattoos isn't that bad."

Lena laughed. For the first time in a long time, she laughed. Kara laughed with her, filling Lena with the warmth that sound always brought her.

Perhaps things were not so bad after all. There were things to solve, feelings to understand. But they'd get through it.


End file.
